Field of Daisies

I just started reading another book by John Eldredge called Waking the Dead. While it has had a bit of a slow start, I believe it is getting ready to pick up some steam....

So far, the most profound thing I've read is about the three eternal truths that we, as Christians, often either don't know, don't believe, or can't seem to remember. While I knew these truths, the way they're presented in the book has been fresh and I've found them to be irrefutably vital to my daily walk through this life. Here they are:

I've only read the first 55 pages, but already I can recommend this book as a must-read.

Posted by at 11:51 AM | Permalink

Parenting is perhaps the most difficult job on earth. The hours are long, the pressure is high, the emotions run deep. The investment is incalculable. The dilemmas we face often result in unpopular decisions. We must not only take into account our children's safety (physical, emotional, and spiritual), their heart, and their desires, but we must also be willing to be the 'bad guy.' No-win situations are plentiful. Tempers flare. Feelings get hurt. And hurtful words get thrown about, often much too carelessly.

We must work diligently to oversee their activities: planning, scheduling, outfitting, shuttling, and paying all the sundry fees, purchasing equipment, giving of our time, our attention, our support, and our encouragement.

We have to set appropriate boundaries, discern the most appropriate, most effective consequences, and inform them in advance of the repercussions for breaching the boundaries. Then we must respond swiftly and definitively when those inevitable breaches occur. When they make bad choices we must be willing to recognize them for what they are, set aside our own feelings about the situation(s), and proceed as promised. Above all we must be trustworthy and true to our word--even and especially when it is most difficult to do so.

Then when we 'blow it,' we must work diligently to mend those broken places, being willing to admit our own flaws and mistakes, and being ready and willing to ask forgiveness when necessary.

Yes, parenting is hard, but God has been teaching me some things about doing it more effectively--especially when dealing with a more 'difficult' child. First, you have to...

Pay Your Do’s:

Yes, today is my birthday! And it started out great with breakfast in bed--hot coffee, my favorite cereal, and my mother's homemade cinnamon rolls...yum! Then I spent the next hour or so working on my current Bible study -- Experiencing God. (It's an awesome study!) Afterward, I showered, we ran some errands, then picked up burgers from Johnnie's and went to a park here in town for a picnic. (Socrates had a blast!)

After Joel and the kids played foxtail for a while, we came back home, and I was showered with gifts--among which were two personalized, original pieces of artwork by two of my very favorite people: Zach and Jenna. Then Socrates and I took a short afternoon nap...pure heaven!

The kids have karate this evening, so we'll take them to class then go out for a nice 'birthday' dinner after that.

So far it's been a great day, and there are still several hours left in it with which to celebrate.... :-)

Posted by at 04:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Someone once told me, "Be careful what you ask for." Advice well heeded, even when it comes to prayer.

Years ago I ran across the following quote in a Christian magazine:

That one, simple sentence--a prayer, really--moved me so deeply I wrote it in the inside cover of my Bible. Little did I realize how seriously God would take my plea.

Over the years, God has taken me through some of the most difficult challenges (trials) of my life. And yes, my heart has been broken time and time again by things I am certain likewise break His heart. But the interesting thing is that because of those difficult times, I have been drawn into an intimacy with Him I never knew was possible. Because of His faithfulness in the darkest, most seemingly hopeless situations, He has been my strength, my comfort, my fortress, my Counselor, my Defender, and my Friend. I have come to know Him as a trustworthy confidante, a wise counselor, and a stern disciplinarian. I have heard His "still, small voice" echoing through my spirit. I have experienced His silence as He allowed me the privilege of figuring certain things out on my own. I have witnessed His reprimand when I 'got out of line.' I have known His protective hand, His tender touch, and His amazing grace and mercy.

And still I want to know Him more. Still there is so much in me to be worked out, burned out, softened, and honed.

The more I know Him, the more I realize I've only scratched the surface. Knowing Him is like the smell of baking bread to a starving man.... A smell, a taste of Him leaves me wanting more; my appetite is whetted--never satisfied. The 'belly' of my spirit is never full. I only and always want more of Him. It's a hunger that pulls me in closer, but never aches.

Do I regret the prayer for a broken heart? No. I have mourned many losses over the years, but I wouldn't take one of them back. The road to knowing God's heart is a terribly difficult one indeed, but well worth it. The price is high, but worth the cost. The payoff always exceeds the investment!

Certainly be careful what you ask for, but realize that no matter what you ask of God, His answer will always be His absolute best for you--even it you don't understand it...because He loves you that much!

*Quote by Bob Pierce, founder of World Vision and Samaritan's Purse.

Posted by at 09:59 PM | Permalink

Well, whatya know!?! We completed Zach's room remodeling last night--for the most part. He still doesn't have a bed, but one is on the way and should arrive on Friday.

Zach still has some bags of things to go through to complete the organization process, but the walls and ceiling are painted and his room is functional again. We even hung two huge posters in his room this afternoon, and of course I will be adding little decorative nuances over the next few weeks.

It's not the Trading Spaces event to end all events, but I dare say even Paige Davis would be impressed with our efforts!

Posted by at 09:45 PM | Permalink

There’s a story in the Bible of a rich young ruler that wanted to follow Jesus. He proclaimed that he had kept all the commandments of Moses (yeah, right—as if anyone can do that!), but Jesus responded to him, “One thing you still lack: sell all that you possess and distribute it to the poor, and you shall have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.”

For those of us that want to follow Jesus, this is a lesson we must take fully to heart. So let’s examine closer what was really going on here.

Did Jesus mean that everyone who follows Him must literally sell all their possessions? No. Jesus saw into the heart of this young man and knew of his love for money. As much as he wanted to follow Jesus, this man cared more for his material possessions. His wealth had become his god.

The greatest commandment in the Bible is to love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. The second is similar: to love your neighbor as yourself. (Matt. 22:37-39) God requires that we love Him first and foremost above all other people, all other things, and above ourselves. He requires it. He deserves it. And to the one who obeys this command, the gates of heaven are thrown open and the blessings of God come pouring forth.

But to the one who places a greater value on other people, other things, or the selfish desires of their own hearts, Jesus said “it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle….”

My own heart echoes the response of the rich young ruler to this treatise: “Who then can be saved?”

To which Jesus quickly answered: “The things that are impossible with people are possible with God.”

For those who think their salvation is up to them, this is another confirmation that our salvation is only possible because God makes it so. He calls us. He draws us to Himself. He paid the price for our salvation through the life, death, burial, and resurrection of His one and only Son, Jesus. And He enables us to love Him enough to put Him first in our life.

Is there ‘one thing’ in your life? Is there one thing that stands between you and a close, personal relationship with the One True God of the universe? Is it money, as in the case of the rich young ruler? Is it sin? Is it pride? Is it a person, a job, a habit, or a selfish desire?

God knows your heart. He created you. He formed you. He has been there with you, walking with you through every day of your life. And He loves you with a love that knows no bounds…. Are you willing to love Him enough to give up your one thing today? Are you willing to ask Him to enable you to love Him above all else in your life?

All I know is this: If you are willing, He is ready. And it is a choice you will never regret….

Posted by at 10:20 AM | Permalink

Well, we are on to day 2 in our current remodeling project! We didn't get as far as I had hoped yesterday--no surprise there! (Removing the wallpaper border took far longer than we had anticipated!) But we did get the room cleared out, the wallpaper taken down, and two coats of primer up on the walls.

Today, the plan is to paint the ceiling and the walls and clean up. If all goes well, we should be able to "load" the room tomorrow! (Of course I still need to purchase a bed for Zach....)

Keep your fingers crossed!

Posted by at 10:15 AM | Permalink

Yes, we're at it again! This time it's Zach's room that's getting a make-over. Since he is 12 now, we decided that it was time to let go of the primary colored cartoon cars, trucks, and airplanes that have adorned his space for 5-1/2 years now.

We have begun disassembling the room. The bunk bed is already out in the garage, and drawers and shelves have been emptied. The plan for today is to complete the "unloading" process (--that's Trading Spaces lingo!), fill the nail holes, remove the wallpaper border, and apply a coat of primer. (We're keeping our fingers crossed that the red and navy blue will vanish successfully under just one coat of primer....)

We won't be able to accomplish this project in the two days the pros do it on Trading Spaces, but we don't have a designer, a carpenter, or any kind of expert in this area. We're not even hiring a painter this time! All we have it little old us! But the ceiling in Zach's room is only 8', so hopefully we will be able to tackle this task without too much difficulty.

We'll keep you posted!

Posted by at 09:15 PM | Permalink

Fairy tales. Princes and kingdoms; knights on white horses defending ladies in distress.
Love songs with sweeping melodies, sweet and tender and moving.
A pastel dawn, crisp and clear.
The subtle fragrance of roses freshly picked from the vine.
The spring breeze teasing the first blossoms on a cool sunny morning.
The last clouds of sunset, a palette of lavenders and blues and pinks blushing at the closing moments of the day.
A brief afternoon thunderstorm in the mountains on a perfect summer day.

All these things stir the soul, tweak the heartstrings, and longing erupts, catapulting the lonely, the discouraged, the unfulfilled into a tailspin. Regrets arise. Wishes multiply. Disappointments turn to despair.

But it isn’t supposed to be that way. Such beauty should inspire boundless joy. That it instigates sadness instead is a clear signal something is wrong. Now, here, at the early autumn of my life I have learned what’s wrong: I have embraced a lie. I have been told all my life that fairy tales are not real; that there is no Prince Charming; that love like that doesn’t exist. That is the lie. The truth, I’ve discovered, is that the fairy tale is real! Not only am I the damsel in distress, but Prince Charming has come to slay the dragon and to carry me off to a place where we will live happily ever after. The story has already been written, even to the last word of the last chapter. I am the love interest, the heroine of the story. And my Prince has gone to prepare the wedding feast, as well as a home for me beyond my wildest dreams. Though the dragon lives on and works day and night to torment me, though the battle rages on for this bride, the ending is sealed; promised; guaranteed. The dragon loses and is thrown into the fiery sea, while my Prince, my Savior carries me off to a place where there is no more crying, no more suffering, no more battle or danger or fear or shame. And the King beams with delight.

I am the beloved, loved with an everlasting love; drawn with love; strengthened with love; sustained by love. Jesus is my Bridegroom; the Lover of my soul; my Hero; my Savior; my Knight in Shining Armor. Father God is the Wise King; crowned with all glory, praise, and honor, with my Jesus by His side. And satan is the defeated dragon thrown headlong into the lake of fire. His arrows have become kindling. His minions have turned to stubble and smoke.

That is the promise. That is the ending written at the dawn of time by the Author of all things. This ending is secure. I am the beloved. My future is sealed with a Happy Ending to end all happy endings.

How can it be that I am just now discovering this? For my entire adult life I have hated fairy tales. Oh I’ve watched them; cried during them; and longed to be loved as the heroine is loved. But I hated them for toying with my emotions; for showing me what my heart longs for but can never have. Yet now I discover that they are my story and have been all along! That I have been loved with that kind of love. The longing was His invitation to come to Him. The disappointment, the despair, the dashed dreams were all misguided and misspent because what I longed for was mine all the time.

How can this be so? And yet I know it to be true. No, I cannot feel His arms about me. I cannot gaze into His eyes. He has not carried me off into the sunset of eternity where we will live together happily ever after—yet. But that is my promise—made by the King Himself. I have it in writing! And it is sealed with the precious blood of my Savior—the One Who laid down His life that I might live.

My husband is not my Prince Charming. He was never meant to be. The hopes I pinned on him were impossible for him to live up to. I had pinned them on the wrong person.

“There could never be anyone for me but you…,” the lover in the movie testifies to his beloved. The music swells; the couple embraces, kissing one another deeply, tenderly, passionately. Tears of longing tumble down my cheeks, threatening to turn to tears of disbelief. And yet I do believe. This time instead of emptiness, as I accept the invitation I am filled with anticipation; I am drawn to my True Love, the Author of this sacred romance….

Of course I am not the only beloved. This bride is but one facet of the bride as a whole, though the Bridegroom is One and complete. I am my Beloved’s and His desire is for me…. It has been this way all along.

I never knew…. I never knew….

Yes, my friend, the fairy tale is real. We can set our heart on this new hope knowing that someday it will be reality. Until then, He will continue to woo us with sweeping melodies and fragrant roses and blushing sunsets. He will court us with afternoon thundershowers and pastels at daybreak. He will thrill us with the newness of another springtime; He will warm us with the hot breath of summer; chill us with crisp autumn days; and delight us with fresh fallen snow, wafting down, silently creating a winter wonderland of white. He will dazzle us with a full moon; huge and orange rising on the horizon, and shooting stars falling through a satiny black sky. He will serenade us with the birds’ morning songs and the laughter of our children. Why? Because He loves us that much! He loves us—you and me—with a love so daring, so passionate, so consuming—yet tender and gentle and kind. He loves us the way we always wanted to be loved—needed to be loved—longed to be loved…. He is the Lover of our dreams, the fulfillment of the longing that He placed there Himself. He authored our longing, our desires, our needs so that He would be the perfect Filler of them. How much better could it get?

And yet I must wait to hold Him in my arms. I must wait to be carried away toward our eternal home. For now I must bide my time, holding tight to the promise, girding myself in the strength of His Spirit against the enemy that still rages against me, whispering his lies, shooting his fiery darts in a futile effort to come between my Lover and me. Ah, but his days are numbered. His time is coming. Meanwhile he flails wildly at everyone the Prince holds dear.

“Someday my Prince will come…” I hear the words rising and falling upon the melody of the old fairy tale. Except this fairy tale is true. Someday my Prince will come for me. And I will be ready; heart filled with devotion; steadfast and true; holding tightly to the promise of my Betrothed. All in due time….

We will feast together! We will dance and laugh and gaze into each other’s eyes as lovers do. I will sing for Him a love song so sweet, in a voice so perfect. And we will be together always…. Nothing will ever come between us again. I am my Beloved’s and His desire is for me.

May I never forget. May I never again listen to the lies of the enemy. Lord, let me be found faithful at the coming of my Prince….

Posted by at 03:15 PM | Permalink

Suffering is right! I saw the movie last night and could barely take it. I thought I would weep through the whole thing, but I think I was in such shock at the brutality of it (and that He endured it for me, because of my sin...) that I was beyond tears except for a couple of scenes... The first was during the scourging of Christ when the shards at the end of the scourge dug deep into His flesh, leaving huge gashes as the whip was pulled away. (It was the only time I noticed an audible gasp throughout the audience....) The second was as Jesus, beaten beyond recognition, made His way through the streets of Jerusalem toward Golgotha. During one of His many falls under the weight of the cross, His mother watched from nearby remembering a time when as a small child this same Jesus had fallen down. In the flashback she ran to her Son, calling His name; then as she reached Him, she held Him in her arms and said, "I'm here...I'm here..." as she rocked Him in her arms. Then returning her attention to the present, she ran to her now grown Son in like manner, calling His name. Upon reaching Him, she fell to the ground near Him and spoke the same words through tears, "I'm here...I'm here..." It was truly too much to take in.... (Again, the thought kept going through my mind, He did it all for me....)

As the movie ended and the lights came up, for whatever reason, that's when the tears began to flow... I had an almost uncontrollable urge to sob openly, but managed to maintain a degree of composure. As we walked through the mall toward our car, I couldn't help but notice that everything seemed surreal. It's difficult to explain, but something changed in me as a result of watching this movie. The way I looked at the world had changed--probably, because for the first time I began to understand more clearly just what He had done for me....

Joel and I talked about the movie all the way home, analyzing different aspects of it. Biblically speaking, it seemed to be fairly accurate. Some artistic license was taken, as is to be expected, but not overly so. We both agreed that while the physical suffering was clearly beyond words, the one element that was glaringly absent was that of His spiritual suffering after He was arrested. We got a glimpse of intense spiritual agony as He prayed in the garden, but at the pinnacle of His sacrifice, when the weight of all of mankind's sin was laid upon Him, the spiritual aspect was not there. Not that it could've been adequately portrayed, but some representation was needed, I think. Overall, however, it was a well-done cinematic feat--not the usual low-budget "Christian" pablum we're used to. (No offense intended.)

Beyond that it's difficult to find the words to communicate the scope of this movie. There truly are no words to do it justice. I have to say, however, that it was in no way anti-Semitic. Jesus clearly proclaimed at least twice (that I noticed) that this was how it had to be--first when He told Pilate that the only reason he had any authority in the situation was because it was given to him by God; and second, when, in a flashback to His recent Passover dinner with the disciples, He told them they were His friends, quoting the powerful words from Scripture: "Greater love has no man than to lay down His life for His friends..." He told them all that He was laying down His life for them. No, no one 'took' Jesus' life from Him. He gave it freely. Had He not given over His life of His own accord, no one could've taken it from Him. This was indeed how it had to be: the spotless Lamb of God was slain as a blood sacrifice to atone for the sins of the world--including me.

Did the chief priests, scribes, and Judas bear some responsibility for the part they played in the crucifixion of Christ? Yes, most certainly so. But were all Jews everywhere to blame? No. These Jewish leaders and Judas did indeed commit a heinous crime against our Lord, but their sin is on their heads alone. Toward the end, as the earthquake ripped through the temple where those same leaders were gathered, I actually felt pity for them. I don't know if they ever realized that they had actually had their long-awaited Messiah murdered. I doubt it, considering how things have played-out since. But one day they will know for certain what they did, and yes, they will have to give account for their actions. For that, I do pity them greatly.

Is this a movie that everyone should see? No! But it is an incredible depiction of the sacrifice and suffering of Christ. Much caution is warranted when considering taking children to this movie. It is brutally violent and extremely bloody--fully earning its "R" rating. Likewise, it could be a wonderful evangelical tool for those who have not yet counted the cost of their sin.

As for me, yes, I do believe it changed me. I haven't been able to debrief myself fully, yet, but I know that the impact was great.

And no, I will never forget that this is what He did for me.

Posted by at 10:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)